The revelation came out only after a recording of Evensong was accidentally played back at half speed
WINDSOR Eton College’s chapel choir confirmed this week that one chorister has apparently been silently miming the demanding descant part during Evensong for three consecutive terms, a discovery that only came to light after a recording was accidentally played back at half speed during a rehearsal review.
How The Deception Was Actually Uncovered
The choirmaster, reviewing a recent recording to critique the choir’s phrasing, noticed one voice simply wasn’t present in the audio at the exact moment the boy in question was, by all visual evidence, singing his heart out from the back row.
The Boy’s Explanation
Confronted afterward, the chorister reportedly admitted the descant had always been “a bit beyond him” but that he’d genuinely enjoyed being part of the choir and hadn’t wanted to give up his place over what he called “a technical singing issue.”
How He Actually Pulled This Off For So Long
Fellow choristers noted he’d developed genuinely convincing physical mannerisms, correct breathing posture, well-timed mouth movements, and an expression of visible effort during the trickiest passages, all without producing any actual sound.
The Choirmaster’s Response
Rather than removing him, the choirmaster has reportedly offered the boy proper vocal coaching, calling the whole episode “frankly more commitment to the bit than most of the choir shows to the actual singing.”
What This Means Going Forward
The chorister has apparently agreed to the coaching, though several choir members have admitted they’ll genuinely miss watching him mime with such total, theatrical conviction every single Sunday. Further school satire coverage continues at bohiney.com.
SOURCE: https://bohiney.com
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